This story started about 3 days ago. On a Thursday morning I was informed of the
Book Fair taking place at the school and 3 of my 5 girls requested that I
purchase them a new book from the book fair when we attended the basketball
game that evening. Most parents wouldn’t
hesitate, they asked for new books, not video games or toys. It wouldn’t have mattered what they asked for
my answer still would have been the same.
I asked, “Are your rooms clean?” fully knowing what their
answers would be. The rooms are never
clean, and it drives me crazy. But there
are 5 of them and one of me, and I can no longer keep up with their rooms so I
have to turn a blind eye. I told them
that if they wanted new books they would need to clean their rooms before we
went. I knew they wouldn’t have time to
do that, but they tried. I had to be the
bearer of bad news. A half-ass clean up
wasn’t going to cut it today. The answer
was no. Christmas was a month ago, and
everybody was given new books then, and our area Stock Show is this week too. Our 4-H club makes an annual trip down to take
in the festivities and go swimming and spend the night. So it’s not like they are deprived children.
So with pouty lips they took no for an answer and off to the
basketball game we went. Friday came and
went nobody cleaned their rooms.
Saturday morning Grandma took them ice skating on the dam in the calving
pasture, and they spent the afternoon playing cards at Grandma and Grandpa’s
house. Not exactly the picture of
deprived over worked children.
Sunday morning while I did some chores and caught up on the
phone with my sister, they talked Grandma into skating again. After lunch they wanted to head out to play
or go to Grandma’s to play cards again.
I told them that they needed to spend some time cleaning up their rooms. This was met with the usual excuses and
whining. CM told me it was clean, BR
said she didn’t have to clean it any more than it already was and I couldn’t
make her clean it.
I literally laughed out loud! Ha Ha Ha! I thought she knew
better than that! Apparently she didn’t. So we went from a quick half hour
clean up to a Sunday afternoon lesson of who is the boss, and living here is
privilege, not a right.
I said, “That’s fine, you can choose. Clean your room like I
want it cleaned or you can move out to the pickup camper in the trees (An old
camper they use to play in in the summer). But I want to make it clear, there
is no heat out there, no water, no electricity, no food, and it’s going to get
cold tonight. You haven’t had a shower all weekend, so you already stink, and
you will have to go to school tomorrow smelling like that. You won’t have any supper, because you don’t
have any food, or anyway to get food because you don’t have a job or a
car. So that means probably no breakfast
either. You will have to wake up earlier
than usual to get to school because you don’t own a car, so you will need to
leave earlier to get to the bus because you will have to walk.”
BR was still feeling pretty defiant. CM wasn’t real sure she should follow
suit. But the two of them are partners
in crime. I could tell that CM’s 18
months more age and wisdom had her thinking this maybe was a bad idea, but BR
was pretty full of herself so CM jumped on board. They followed me into their room where I
pointed out the things I wanted done to my specifications. BR looks at CM and says “Ha, let’s just move
out to the camper.” I smiled and said,
“That’s fine, pack your bags.” They were
pretty excited about setting out on their own.
They even recruited TB to help them pack their things to the
camper. TB being slightly older and
wiser helped them and came back to the house and promptly started cleaning her
room with a smile (Which if you know TB that doesn’t happen very often).
As I worked on bookwork in the office the Husband and I spied
out the window as they proudly marched out to the camper to set up their new home.
They were playing on a snowbank in front of the camper, so I ran out to with a
camera, I told them I needed a picture of the homeless people living in my tree
belt. I got them to pose in front of
their new home, still smug.
They came in a little later asking how much school lunches
cost, they had pooled their money and were planning out how long they could
live on their own buying school lunches.
They returned back out to their little home in the trees, still smiling.
Sometime later they came to the house they were starting to
rethink their plan, and offered to clean their room, and they would move back
in. A normal mother may have let the
lesson end there. Not this one. I want
the lesson to stick. I proceeded to tell
them, “You made a choice, and now you are going to have to live with it. It really isn’t so bad living here in Dad and
I’s house. You are provided meals, a
warm place to live, your laundry is washed for you and you are pretty well
taken care of. Once and a while you are
asked to help with some things, contribute to the family and have respect for
the things you do have. That is just
part of being a family we all have to pitch in and do our part and have respect
for each other.”
Back outside they went, faces not as smiley and smug as they
were when they first started this little protest. The husband came and pulled me to the window,
he noticed they had put a small pot on the burn barrel that we burn garbage
in. KJ had lit it earlier in the day so
it was still warm. They told us they
were melting snow to shower with. They
had packed shampoo and conditioner in their bags when they left, but no towels. That was going to be a cold bath, then to
crawl into a camper without heat. We watched as they moved around the outside
of the house pressing their noses against the window glass like sad puppies
watching us inside.
We let them peer in the window for a little while longer. As
the sun began to set I invited them inside the entryway. I asked if they wanted to move back in. Yes,
of course they did. The idea of sleeping
in that dirty cold camper wasn’t so appealing after all. I asked if they had
made a good choice. No, they hadn’t. I asked if they were going to listen and
follow directions and be part of the family. Yes, they wanted to do
better. They returned all their
belongings back to the house and were told to clean their room before supper
was ready. CM comes into the kitchen and
says “I shouldn’t have listened to BR.” I think she may have learned a lesson
in thinking for herself as well. It’s
good to make decisions for yourself, not just willingly follow someone because
they think it’s a good idea.
The two dirty girls very humbly cleaned their room before
supper, picked up and washed supper dishes, showered and vacuumed their
room. All while working together and not
bickering or fighting. Let’s hope the lessons sticks, but if not they
are more than welcome to make themselves at home in the Camper in the Trees
anytime.
